Saturday, September 10, 2011

New blog

Cuz google sucks and I lost my old one. Whatever.
Anyway, I said i'd blog twice a week every week i was at school, but i'm already sorta sucking at tha, so here's my first! Gotta start somewhere. Anyhow, I've been here for 9 days now, and it's pretty sweet. Everyone knows about the coolness of college. The freedom, new friends, your own space, etc. But here at Umass, there's an interesting phenomenon. It's like the jersy shore, but this isnt on tv. it's happening ight in front of you. That is, if you live in the residential area known as "south-west". I am of course talking about "bro culture"

It's truely something to behold. It's like a super virus that cannot be escaped. You are not safe in your dorm. Cuz they live down the hall. You are not safe outside. They're looking for a party. You're not safe in the dining hall. They need their protein. Of course, there are a few exceptions. the library is relatively bro free. My friend's dorm (in central), is pretty free of bros. But on the other hand, there are area's on campus that can only be discribed as "bro-factories".

The gym. nuff said.

One of the most intriguing and hilarious part of bro culture, is the communication with their twin soceity: "ho culture". A basic transaction is as follows:

bro: Hey Tina! lookin' sexy ;-)
ho: OMG shut up Billy!
bro: yea, you want this! (points to crotch)
ho: omg you're such a d-bag!
and then later tht night they both end up getting really drunk and have (not sex, but) unfortunate reproductive practices.

I'll rap it up here. I'll have some real stories for future posts. but next time i'll discuss one of the most digusting, intriguing, terrifying, and horrible things at Umass: A south-west bathroom.